Back to Square One?

Will all my efforts be wasted? Will I be back to where I started? I am not sure. I will not take that step if I am unsure of what will happen. For the past few months I have tried hard. Well not as hard as I might but first time I was not sure. Is it all set on the path of failure from the start?

Which One?

Finally weekend again. Started on a Hong Kong drama serial show hope to finish watching it by mext week. Will also be going for a family lunch. Then maybe will meet up with some friends. But the problem is it will be expansive!!! Weekends going out sounds fun but spending money not cause I am a poor student. Next tues meeting up with another group of friends. How? I need to decide. Weigh my options. Is it money or the company?

Much Better.

These few day have been fine. With CNY just around the corner, after it then I will leave the country. Yup on with my studies. I really need to do better. Need to do much better then now. Well other then studies need to tone up body as well rite? Up to oneself.

Same day Same event?

As usually another boring day went pass. Well, these few day really did a lot of reading. I have finished 3 books to be precise. I also met some old + new friends on Sat. I must say had a great time. Just idling around the streets, did some window shopping also had a cuppa and catched a moive. "Alfie" is was not too bad all about this 'playboy' who goes around dating girls but in the end ends up no one. I was caught on by the way he tells his story by looking straight into the camera through out the whole show. Of course to pull it of there is the nice looking actor Jude Law with his killer smile.

There is still Hope.

Had a good day today. Went for a swim. Finished the book that I was reading. And went I went jogging yesterday, a fellow runner smiled and said "hi". It really was a highlight for my day. It seems all is not as bad as I tought it would be. And that there is still hope. And the weekend is coming!!! Well not that I have anything important planned, but I just feel better on weekend. Don't you?

Not there yet

Still in the down state of life. Everything seems to be wrong, go wrong and is wrong. Oh!!! What is happening?
Is this just a stage in life or will it be permernent? Depressed. At Ground Zero. Lowest state? Or can I go any lower?

All Came Crashing Down

Totally everything came crashing down. I think I may suffer a mental breakdown soon. Is it me? Am I really that " far" from the real world. What can I do? Kill myself? I think somtimes maybe I think too much. Oh , all the pressure. I must learn to let go. I will FAIL in life if I continue like that. That is why I think I should never get a other self. I will only drive everyone mad. Really cannot take it anymore. Wish I can view this world from outside. But I fear DEATH.

37.3

Feeling much better. I was chatting with some friends yesterday then sudden one of them said that I have changed. For the better or worst? No one mentioned. I am puzzled, not sure of how to react to it.
Well, for today, other than cooking did some reading. I must say made a great jump in the number of pages read. Hope to be done with the book before 13th jan. Why? It is because that is the due date. For lunch want to have porridge but was too lazy to cook too weak as well. Therefore went to the shop opposite to buy lunch.
Now I need to e-mail some photos taken by mine digicam to some people. Also received an important SMS today. That's all.

All is not Well...

I fell ill today. Woke up with a bad headache and tummyache, went to the toliet 5 times during the day. TODAY, a really bad day for me. The whole body is feeling very weak. But well still have to cook rite? Anyway need to rest, lets blog again another time.

First Day

I spent the whole of last night bowling and doing a mini-countdown. Actually felt a bit bad cause could still remember the event on Boxing Day. Well met some friends in the afternoon for tea, actually it was suppose to be lunch but I missunderstood and went there late. "pai sei" But had a great time. Will be leaving for Bintan for the next 3 days for a small getaway. Top on the list get a nice golden tan, if the sun is willing. Second of course to relax. I think I need to get back to the books right away after the three days. Need to start early. No Blogging!!!

The toll is still rising. Help is pouring out. Also not sure what to do. Indo gives up on counting the dead. 7.0 one hiting it again.

Lastly lets hope that 05 will be a better year.