The day has came and left...

Yesterday marked another year I have spent living in the world. Having spend two decades plus plus in the human world, I must say I seem to have not done anything significient yet. Nothing that I can be really proud of. No great acheivement that I can boast about. Not even a person to brag to if I wanted to. A small unoticeable presence in the huge world.

Times have come in where I live that we have to draw a little cross on a little piece of paper. But for me it is a walkover. If only life for me is as simple as that. You have a choice they say. But I do not have. Or do I? Least to say I am also unsure myself.

Maybe I need to start to relook at how I have walked the path till this moment. Many wrong turns I have made? Did that cause me to be in this state now? Is it FATE playing games? Or is it deal onto me cause of mine inability to run one's life? Questions I cannot answer? Where to find they sometimes I ask. My circle seems small compared to others. To make things worst it seems to be strinking. Others seem to be flying while I can only sit back and admire. Do I really want that? But can I do it? Sometimes the right seems wrong the wrong seems right. Who is to be the judge of one's life? Oneself? Or the legacy that you leave behind? Or families & friends? Or even foes?

The thin line separating success and failure. Is there a space in between? Maybe it is not a line but a huge space between. Just like the different shades of grey that can be between black and white. Or is this just an excuse that I have created for myself? But at times I also seem to think that I maybe thinking too much into some stuff. At times I seem to lack a life that is "happening". By "happening" may or may not mean clubbing. But just having stuff to do, places to go, food to eat and people to meet. To put it in terms of colors theirs will be full of them, all the colors of the rainbow. Splashes of color here and there. In mine there is a lack of color. As the media people would say Black is the lack of color. Itself is not actually a color. As for white it is when all the colors come together to form a new color. But it can also in another terms means boring and mandane. With that being said, am I in the grey area? If so what shade of grey am I?

Hush hush...The sun has set and the stars are shining bright. It is time to sleep.